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I’m not particularly religious. I DO however, consider myself spiritual. While I certainly don’t think this blog is the appropriate place to discuss my beliefs, I’m sure it filters through at times.

I’ve mentioned briefly before that I recently read (and fell in love with) the book, “Eat, Pray, Love” by Liz Gilbert. It is a beautiful novel - truly powerful and moving, and I learned a lot about life by reading it.

One lesson in particular hit me hard. I’d like to share it with you but before I do, I need to be very clear about something:

What I believe doesn’t matter. What the author believes doesn’t matter. The word “God” is used in this story and, whether or not you believe in God, it is a powerful idea that is being expressed. Don’t get distracted by the word and don’t worry about your definition of God verses the next person’s definition. Just take this story at face value and consider the simple wisdom of it.

The author, Liz Gilbert had been going through a severe and prolonged depression. When the story starts, she is at a breaking point. She finds herself waking up at times in the middle of the night to sob alone in her bathroom. She is consumed by her grief and her frustration that life is simply not what she wants it to be. She doesn’t know what to do or how to make it better. She is completely lost. 

One night, sitting on the floor of her bathroom crying, she finds herself doing something unexpected. Never a very religious person, she spontaneously begins to pray. Speaking to God she asks, “What do I do? Please just tell me what I should do.”

And very plainly, very clearly she hears God’s voice reply, “Liz, go back to bed.”

Just writing this story gives me chills and brings tears to my eyes. It is such a powerful lesson - that sometimes, there is nothing we can do. There is nothing we should do. We simply must carry on. We must live with it and know that the pain is a part of life. We all go through hard times. We all need guidance and seek it in different ways and forms.

For those of you who may be going through hard times, I offer no additional advice - just this story. And a reminder that we’ve all been there and we’ll all end up there again. The world is full of ups and downs. Some call it “the tao” or “the way”. It’s the nature of life.

So keep this in mind the next time you feel yourself breaking down and asking for guidance. Remember these four wise words: go back to bed. I’ve been telling myself that a lot lately. When all seems lost and you’re begging for guidance, the simple idea of standing still, doing nothing and moving along in the “flow” can be quite comforting.

There are, of course, times to rise up and make a fuss and fight until your knuckles bleed. But it’s not all the time.

Have a restful, wonderful weekend and “God” bless all of you.

I had an interesting request from a reader the other day: “Kathleen” said her boss had expressed that he was unhappy with their partnership and that he wanted her to create some kind of “communication system” to help them build a stronger connection.

Well, Kathleen was perplexed! She had felt things were going just fine! “What the heck is a communication system,” she wanted to know, “and where do I get one??”

I gave her a minimal amount of advice and then told her I would take some time to think about it and post an article on the topic. As I’ve said before, the solution to one person’s problem will likely help many.

I first told her that she needed specifics. In a case such as this, when a certain level of dissatisfaction has been expressed, it’s important to get to the root of the problem. What has happened that makes her boss feel disconnected from her? What does an ideal partnership look like for him? Can he cite some specific instances when things haven’t gone as he would have liked? What does he want to accomplish by having a “communication system”?

From the words he used – Communication System – it’s probably a fair guess that he feels two things: a lack of communication and a lack of organization. These are probably two of the most critical components of a successful EA/Executive relationship. In an attempt to gain a feeling of control, he’s asked his EA to set forth specific guidelines for their communication – a winning idea, in my opinion.  She now has a huge opportunity to create a standard for how she’d like to work with him.

A few things came to mind for me when I first heard this. One: my boss and I often have communication breakdowns. It’s one of those things we’ve both come to realize and so, when it happens, we sit down and try to turn the “breakdown” into a “breakthrough”.  What I mean by this is, we figure out what happened and what we are going to do to make sure that particular breakdown never happens again. For example, I realized that when he is out of town, I was never quite sure what he was doing. Therefore, I never felt confident to call (for fear of interrupting him). I would let things pile up and then bombard him when he got back. Not a good way to go. So, the “breakthrough” came when we established a “system” of daily phone call check-ins. Each morning, even when he’s traveling, we check-in (via phone if necessary). We tell each other our agendas for the day and he lets me know when (and for what) I can interrupt him. It works beautifully.

Another reader responded to Kathleen’s problem by adding that a daily e-mail wrap-up at the end of the day would help as well. That way, she can clearly lay out for him what she accomplished, what she needs assistance on, and just generally what has been happening. It may seem like overkill to some of you, but for relationships in turmoil, there is no such thing as too much communication!

I would also stress the importance of weekly “State of the Union” Meetings. I’ve talked about this idea in the past and, typically a monthly meeting is fine. But again, when the relationship is rocky, too much communication is not a concern. The State of the Union Meeting is a scheduled appointment between the EA and the executive. This is a time to sit down and focus solely on the partnership between them. They can each say how they feel things are going, express praise for what worked well and suggest solutions for what didn’t. It helps to keep a small list of things you’d like to talk about in the meeting throughout the week. That way, you have specifics to illustrate your points. This meeting can really help get the relationship back on track because it opens communication and provides specific time for brainstorming together and just improving the state of affairs for everyone.

So, to wrap it up, I would suggest the following “Communication System” for Kathleen and her boss:

1. Conversation to take place detailing exact circumstances for the request
2. Daily check-in conversations to take place each morning – in person or via phone if traveling
3. Daily e-mail wrap-ups to be sent at the end of each day
4. Weekly “State of the Union” Meetings to take place with a scheduled appointment

Good luck, Kathleen! We’re all cheering you on! Please add your comments!

Hey Everyone!

I’ve written quite a few guest posts recently and I just wanted to share a few with you. Drop by and check ‘em out if you’re so inclined. You may find some new fabulous blogs to subscribe to while you’re at it!

Read Is Balance a Myth? where I question if there really is such a thing as work/life balance. It’s over at the Positivity Blog.

I write about my personal problem with authority in Only Suckers Follow the Rules on Scott H. Young’s website.  My mom will be so proud

Learn a few valuable communication tips by reading The Art of Conversation at Organize IT.

5 Tips to Make a Winning First Impression offers a few simple ideas to help you stand out from the crowd (in a good way!). You can find that at Alex Shalman.com.

As many of you know, I am also a contributing writer for Suite 101. Below are a few of my favorite recent articles relating to career:

How to Sell Yourself

How to be Assertive at Work

Tips for Getting a Promotion

How to Win at Work

Friendships at Work

You can also find me at Suite 101 writing about various other topics including Ethics and Nutrition.

Enjoy!

I’m participating in a Group Writing Project through Daily Blog Tips. The topic is “tutorials” so this is my contribution. Hope you guys learn a lot from it and if I left something out be sure to contribute in the comments section below.

The most commonly used type of business letter is the “Block Format” in which all writing is flush against the left margin. I personally use this exclusively because it’s the easiest. I tried to be pretty formal, though you may find that some things are not exactly “by the book”. However, the format outlined here is very acceptable and will meet the needs of nearly any business professional.

Below are the elements to include and some additional notes. You can also view an example here Sample Business Letter

1. Your Address: (Not needed if the letter is printed on paper on company letterhead including the address): The return address of the sender of the letter so the recipient can easily find out where to send a reply.

Skip a line

2. Date: Put the date on which the letter was written in the format Month Day, Year i.e. August 30, 2003. It is typically appropriate to spell out the month instead of using a number format.

Skip a line

3. Reference Line (Re): A short sentence stating the purpose of the letter.

Skip a line

4. Special Mailing Notations: Such as certified mail, special delivery, airmail, etc.

Skip a line (some people skip 3 or 4 lines)

5. Inside Address: The address of the person you are writing to along with the name of the recipient, their title and company name.

Skip a line

6. Salutation: Dear Ms./Mrs./Mr. Last Name:, Dear Manager of Department Name: or To Whom It May Concern: if recipient’s name is unknown. Use a colon after the salutation, never a comma.

Skip a line.

7. Subject Line (optional): Makes it easier for the recipient to find out what the letter is about. It’s a little redundant if using a reference line at the top.

Skip a line.

8. Body: The body is where you write the content of the letter. The paragraphs should be single spaced but double spaced between paragraphs.

Skip a line.

9. Complimentary Closing: This lets the reader know that you are finished with your letter. Typically Sincerely, Sincerely yours, Thank you, and so on. Note that there is a comma at the end of the closing and the first word in the closing is the only one capitalized. I often see “Yours Truly” or “Most Sincerely” which are not correct.

Skip 3-4 lines between the closing and the printed name, so that there is room for the signature.

10. Signature: The sender’s signature will go in this section, usually signed in black or blue ink with a pen.

11. Printed Name: The printed version of the sender’s name with his or her title or position on the line underneath it.

Skip a line.

12. Enclosure Notation: If the letter contains documents other than the letter itself, type the word “Enclosure.” If there is more than one you would type, “Enclosures (#)” with the # being the number of other documents enclosed not including the letter itself.

13. Carbon (or courtesy) Copy Reference (cc): List the names of people (in alphabetical order) to whom you are distributing copies.

14. Reference Initials: If someone other than the sender typed the letter, include the sender’s initials in capital letters followed by the typist’s initials in lower case separated by a slash or a colon (for example: IR/cs or IR:cs)

Additional Notes and FAQ:
Spacing:

Do I use 2 or 1 space after a period?
The Modern Language Association says there’s nothing wrong with 2, but 1 is just fine and generally more accepted

How many blank lines you add between lines that require more than one, depends on how much space is available on the page.

Font:

The most commonly used font is Times New Roman 12 pt. It is very easy to read and looks clean and simple.

Margins:

Margins should be 1 to 1.5 inches all the way around. The length of the letter will dictate which to use. For shorter letters, 1.5 is standard. For longer letters, 1 is standard. Letterhead will determine the top margin for page 1 of any letter.  

Length:

Try to keep letters to one page, but follow this 2nd page format for longer letters:

1. Heading:  Type the recipient’s name, date and reference line from page 1, and page number.

2. Inside Address: from page 1

3. Body: skip three lines then proceed with the body of the letter and continue with the rest of the elements as listed above.

General Note:

If you don’t type one of the more formal components, don’t leave space for them.

I have a secret.

I have multiple personalities. I know it sounds weird, but I bet you do too.

You see, I’m a different person at work. When I walk into the office, I take on my “professional identity”. I’m not saying that I fake who I am. It’s just not the same side of my personality that I normally show when I’m at home or out with friends. It’s my work personality.

She’s a lot stronger than I am. She speaks clearly with confidence and an upbeat, friendly tone of voice. She isn’t afraid of making small talk with powerful people (in fact, she usually creates an easy rapport quite quickly). This gal is smooth under pressure, always thinking two steps ahead.

Mr. Toolbox would laugh to see her. She is so different from the frantic, giggly, gullible girl who loses her keys each morning. He wouldn’t recognize me in my “professional mode”.

I don’t think is all that unusual. I think we all create professional identities as a way of separating ourselves from work. It’s not a bad thing – in fact, I think it helps keep our lives a little more balanced. Surely people will say this is “being fake” and I don’t deny that. There’s nothing that says you have to be real at the office. I mean seriously – do you think the guy in the big Mickey Mouse costume at Disneyland always feels like dancing all day?? Probably not. He fakes it. His work personality is fun, free spirited, whimsical and fanciful. He forgets about his real personality – the one that is worried about how Disney’s stock is doing in his 401(k) plan. He puts on his professional identity and entertains the kiddies.

What’s that you say? What about being authentic? You can still be authentic in your “professional identity”. It’s not like you’re creating a whole different life. You’re just focusing on different parts of your personality – letting the best parts shine through even when they normally might not.

The question is: what kind of professional identity do you want to build for yourself?

Every day we have the opportunity to walk into the office and project the image of the exact type of professional we want to be. We can be confident, responsible, organized, well-spoken, positive, enthusiastic, driven…..You get the idea. Your work “personality” is yours to create. Maybe your boyfriend (or girlfriend) knows that you’re full of nerves about a big presentation. But that doesn’t mean anyone at work has to know. As far as their concerned, you’re the best presenter in the world!! Keep that in mind when you walk in the door and the biggest challenge is behind you.

Think about what you want your professional identity to be. How do you present yourself at the office?

• Do you show a dedication to hard work or do you barely squeak by?
• Are you enthusiastic and driven to succeed or do you do the bare minimum to pick up the paycheck?
• Do you seek out new opportunities or do you hide in the shadows?
• Do you ask questions and soak up the knowledge or do you act like you know it all?
• Are you a team player or do you go it alone?

Your identity is completely up to you.

I had a reader contact me the other day (let’s call him “Steve”) saying he is interested in getting into the administrative field. However, he has no office experience. He is looking for advice because he’s having a huge problem even getting interviews. So, here are a few ideas I’ve come up with to help Steve and really, these ideas can be used for anyone looking to change careers. The tips below can help you when your experience is not typical for the field that you are trying to break into.

Please contribute your own in the comments section. Let’s help out Steve and other readers who are looking for a change!

1. Use non-traditional ways of finding a job

When your resume doesn’t look like typical resume for the field, it will likely get pushed aside – there’s no way around that. Most people who are hiring have a clear idea of the experience they are looking for. You need to use your network – your family members, friends, old teachers, etc – to help you find a position. You will have much better luck getting the interview if you have a cheerleader saying you are the perfect fit for the job. Personal recommendations go further than a resume any day. Join “Young Business Professionals” groups and get to know people in your community. Make sure you tell everyone you meet that you are looking to break into this business.

2. Frame your resume appropriately

Experience is all about how you frame it. Be sure you understand the position you are applying for and then, tailor your resume to show how your experience relates to it.

Personally, I believe ANY position can be useful experience for office administration. ANY POSITION. If you work with people on a construction site in your current job, focus on your communication skills and your ability to be a team player. If you serve tables at a busy restaurant, focus on your ability to multi-task, remain calm under pressure, and prioritize given competing demands. You have to take your experience and move beyond the everyday tasks you have performed. Focus on the skills these tasks have taught you and how they will benefit you in the new career you are seeking. 

3. Stand-out (in a good way)

You already stand out because your resume doesn’t look like everyone else’s. Use that to your advantage. Contact the hiring company with a brief, professional and polite phone call. Explain that you are the one who has a vast amount of experience in a completely unrelated field and that’s why you are so perfect for the job.

4. Spruce up your cover letter

It is ESSENTIAL that you include a very, very strong cover letter with your resume. It must detail your desire to change career and why your skills make that a logical progression in your professional growth. Be specific, energetic and very persuasive. Check out Cover Letter Magic for some assistance.  

5. Consider working with a recruiter

Professional job hunters can help you get interviews that you might never be able to get on your own. Sending a resume to a job posting on Monster can sometimes feel like dropping it into a black hole. Recruiters have an “inside track” and the right person on your side can really help get you in the door. They can sell your skills and background to the hiring company. Don’t expect that they’ll do all the work for you, but they might help get you an interview. What you do with it is up to you!

Keep in mind that the company you will end up working for will need to be comfortable bringing on an inexperienced individual and training them. Believe it or not, that’s not impossible to find. Many companies prefer people without experience because they aren’t bringing a lot of baggage with them (like unwanted behaviors and techniques that were learned elsewhere). An inexperienced individual comes in with a fresh mind, eager to learn and completely willing to step up to a challenge. You need to show them that this you.

Good luck to Steve and anyone else who is looking to make a change! We’re all cheering you on!!

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